Tuesday, October 4, 2011

THE.BEST.SOCIAL.MEDIA.TRAMP.EVER

Wade Cothran, also known as The.Best.Roommate.Ever, reached overnight fame after posting an advert on Craigslist vulgarly specifying all his ‘virtues’ of being a great roomy in a pretty funny and over-the-top manner.
“Konichiwa bitches. Are you looking for the most kick-ass fucking roommate that ever lived? If so, look no further. You fucking found him. I'm a 25-year-old professional marketing agent with experience at bad-ass companies in New York Fucking City. That's right! What you know about experience? I graduated from Auburn University in Alabama, and moved to NYC at the ripe, tender age of 22. After deciding that New York was a stinky shit-hole, I moved back to Alabama to cultivate more professional experience. Why? So I can make millions of dollars and not have to post shit like this on Craigslist.

Anyway, so I landed this job with a marketing firm in San Francisco, and I have no fucking clue where to live. Honestly, I'm moving there in 3 weeks, so I don't give a shit if I have to sleep in your bathtub. “
He became an instant internet star.
But fame has its costs—in Cothran’s case, not one but two jobs. He got fired from the gig he was leaving in Alabama—no big loss—but also from the job he was taking in San Francisco. You know what? He hit the road anyway and arrived in San Francisco where a coterie of well-wishers greeted him.
Cothran, a professional social media marketer working for a larger marketing firm, understands why his personal social media campaign might irk both companies. 
“I totally understand why I was fired,” Cothran told the Daily Dot. “My post was vulgar and could make them look bad.”
Now Cothran, 25, is jobless and homeless—but it may be the best thing that ever happened to him.
He’s got an inbox full of “book proposals, radio interviews, television spots and job offers”—all as a result of the ad. 
But...going by his recent Facebook activity the professional marketer who proudly proclaims he will “consistently blow your fucking mind with awesomeness’ promotes himself as no more than a scrounging, potty-mouthed jackass - not the kindly guy who keeps on giving and expects nothing in return that his new found friends at the Daily Dot define him as.
It doesn’t surprise me that Hollywood’s own immature ejaculation Ashton Kutcher was the first celeb to give Cothran a cringeworthy shout-out via Twitter...like some sort of personal induction to the Brohood of Big Kids.
So what of this inbox full of “book proposals, radio interviews and job offers”? 
Well just five days ago Cothran made another quite lengthy post - one that took more effort than his daily updates of drinking Vodka at garages, eating ecstacy until the morning and advising people to “get fucked up” - it sounded a little more downbeat than his original  post that made him a ‘viral superstar’. 
I've created a PayPal account at the request of some very kind people who want to see me succeed. A dollar or ten or anything will help. Just visit the link below if you can spare a few coins. Thanks to all that donate. Please send me your information, so I can show up to your house and cook you dinner.”
Well it seems Cothran has already broke a pretty important rule of marketing - earning and keeping people’s trust. 
Just one month after declaring in a self-written editorial for the San Francisco Egotist that he was just about to gloriously embark on his journey through an all-u-can-eat pussy buffet” and admitting that he hadn’t broken any of his own rules in stating that “I have not become a reality television star, I have not endorsed a product that you don’t need and I am not asking you to donate or give me money. That’s not what this is about, The.Best.Roommate.Ever is now literally begging YOU, while he sits Tweeting his nomadic ass off in YOUR comfy couch, to fund him while he has the time of his life drinking free beer from YOUR fridge, eating YOUR food (which he’ll kindly cook...wow) and basically being a new-age Social Media Tramp. Well fuck that for a packet of beef jerky.
It’s not that he embarrassed the San Franciscan marketing company he got fired from, or “made them blush” which he arrogantly admits in his childish smart-ass manner, it’s that he’s too naive to realize what they just don’t want...The.Worst.Fucking.Employee.Ever.
Sometimes it just ain’t advisable to market yourself to millions of people around the world that you’re actively pursuing the life of a drunk and a drug-taker while constantly degrading women and relishing the idea of living like a bum when you want to get ahead in the world of marketing. 
WINNING? ... not exactly

2 comments:

  1. You could have just contacted him if you wanted to talk to him for accurate information. I met Wade on his journey to SF, and he only posted his Paypal account online to his personal Facebook page to FAMILY and FRIENDS, and was such an amazing person to be around. Sounds like you have a grudge against someone who had the balls to do something you'll never do, including making millions of people laugh their asses off.

    Nice blog by the way. I found it by searching for images of Wade. Maybe you should thank him for sending page views your way instead of being a huge bag of dicks.

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  2. Stop trying to be Captain Save A Hoe JessiG!

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